The Best TMR Entries from RCandCess pt 2 (2nd Year Anniv Edition)
Top Ten Things That Your Partner Drives You Nuts:
Whenever Cess corrects me while I am driving.
Top Ten Signs You’re Ready to Get Married:
When you look at your future in-laws, at tanggap na tanggap mong magiging kamukha din ng mapapangasawa mo sila years later.
Top Ten Taray Quotes:
My mom to a cashier whenever she forgets to give her the utensils, “Miss, ang spaghetti ba pwede kamayin?”
Top Ten Signs You Partied Too Much, Too Long and Too Hard:
Kinabukasan sa office cafeteria, you go to the tindera, “Mish, patagay ng kapeh!”
Kapag lahat ng di-takong mo, naging step-in na.
When you get home the following morning na, and when your wife asks what happened, you go “blame it on the a-a-a-a-a-alcohol…”
Top Ten Signs Nobody Loves You:
kapag wala kang friends sa Friendster, zero followers sa Twitter, zero hits ang blog, and your Multiply is not mulitplying.
If you go straight from the orphanage to the old folks’ home.
True story: a guy set up 16 fictional Facebook accounts so that he could have “friends.”
Top Ten Waiter Quotes:
When I asked a waitress how long it was going to take my food to get cooked, she said “Soooobrang tagal… kung ako sa inyo, hindi na ko dito kakain…”
Top Ten “Sashal” Moments:
As we were riding my college classmate’s car, he goes, “wait lang, I’ll make my car ‘pabango’ and then he starts spraying Hugo Boss.”
Top Ten Celebrity Jokes:
Q: Bakit ayaw magsuot ng grass skirt ni Mahal? A: Magmumukha siyang SIPA!
Top Ten Foiled Answer-backs:
When I was being bullied, I said, “At least ako mahal ng mama ko… eh kayo… hindi kayo mahal ng… MAMA KO!”
Top Ten Weirdest Fictional News Headlines:
Barangay Mataas-Na-Lupa, Binaha!
Top Ten Funny Love Quotes:
“Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter quite like unrequited love.” –Charlie Brown
Top Ten “Mayabang” Quotes:
Our valedictorian told us while we were reviewing, ‘ba’t pa kayo nagrereview, kung nakinig naman kayo sa lesson?’